"If you can't be pretty, you might as well cause trouble" – Florence King
Posted in Adventures, Gratuitous Cussing, Parenthood, Up The Pole on Jul 26th, 2013
1. Hallucinated 2. Passed out* 3. Gone home with a boy I’d never met before It sounds like I’ve been having wild and salacious times, but in reality, that’s a misleading lead-in to a labor-and-delivery anecdote. On June 28, I was heading down to KU Med for a routine pre-natal appointment, wherein I expected to […]
Posted in Up The Pole on Jun 27th, 2013
made on behalf of my pending baby by total strangers in public: 1. Â It’s a boy because my face looks “normal,” not puffy. Ah…okay. Thanks, I think. Oh, by the way, woman-I’ve-never-seen-before-in-my-life, how do you know what my face looks like normally? I’ll grant you that it does look as normal as my face is […]
Posted in dumb things I have done, Up The Pole, Utter Silliness on Jun 19th, 2013
I got invited to attend a maternity yoga class coming up next week, but I’m afraid I’m still too much of a doofus for yoga. I gave it the ” Facebook Maybe” which is introvert for, “uh, no thanks, but I am too awkward to actually come out and say ‘I won’t be attending.’” Yoga […]
Posted in Sewing, Up The Pole on Jun 15th, 2013
I’ve had this sewing pattern for ages. It was in a box of oddments my grandma gave me shortly after I bought my sewing machine. So, it’s been in my stash since 1996. Grandma had hooked me up with some old sewing patterns, some extra fabric, a couple of how-to books, and a fantastic box […]
Posted in Delight, Up The Pole on May 24th, 2013
The baby fidgets a lot these days. I remember the first time I felt him kick, which was midway through Week 18. I wasn’t entirely sure it was a kick. It happened in the middle of the night, and I laid awake hoping he’d do it again, so I could decide it was for real. […]
Posted in Art Projects & Making Things, Sewing, Up The Pole on May 16th, 2013
Well, well. The last time I posted about diapers, I was quite, quite silly. The “doody diaper” resides in my Milk Crate Of Baby Stuff, and will, of course, be used, but so will this one: This was some novelty calico I bought out of the remnant basket at Bon Bon Atelier last year. I […]
Posted in biking, Other Bike Stuff, Up The Pole on May 6th, 2013
Here I am, at 26 weeks, which is nearly done with the second trimester, or for people who are not up on all the pregnancy lingo shit, around six months along. I am now noticeably pregnant. People ask me when the baby’s due. He keeps up a fairly steady and vigorous march upon my bladder, […]
Posted in dumb things I have done, Oh, for fuck's sake, Super-Short Entries, Up The Pole on Apr 28th, 2013
For the love of all things great and small. Seriously, I left the house in two different shoes today, and then had to work a shift at the grocery store this way. The lower-cut penny loafer was less comfortable than the one with the button trim. They are less broken-in. Lesson. Learned.
Posted in dumb things I have done, Oh, for fuck's sake, Up The Pole on Apr 27th, 2013
Yesterday, for an entire day, I wore my trousers backwards. As in Ass-to-the-Front. Unintentionally. I am not now, nor have I ever been a member of Chris-Kross. I just, apparently, have forgotten how to put my clothes on. Seriously, I go pee like 47 times a day, and I never noticed my britches were on […]
Posted in dumb things I have done, Notions and Rants, Oh, for fuck's sake, Super-Short Entries, Up The Pole, Utter Silliness, Weird as Hell on Apr 26th, 2013
Comes away with: In order to re-charge the Baby, make sure that the charging equipment is plugged in firmly. Failure to ensure a proper junction between charging equipment and docking station can lead to insufficient charging and damage to charging equipment.