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I made a new dress today – it didn’t pan out quite as well as one might have hoped, and it is, of course, my fault, as I did a piss-poor job of matching fabric to pattern design.

I’d bought this fabric with an eye to using it with McCall’s M5974, which is a pattern for a mock-wrap dress, or which can be made as a round-necked dress without the wraparound sash. I chose to make it as a hybrid of the two options. I used the wraparound bodice but omitted the sash. I am 100% satisfied with the pattern, with another minor modification.

The pattern’s back section is cut in two panels, and is shaped by the center back and side seams. Unfortunately, it it is not very fitted in comparison with the very structured front of the dress and hung quite regrettably between my shoulder blades and buttocks, so I ended up tracing a pair of French darts in to give it a little better waistline definition.

Because the back is drafted in two panels, and there is quite a bit of flare to the skirt, there was no practical way to make the large-scale zig-zag print match up in any satisfactory fashion at the top half of the back section of the dress. See below:
Please forgive me the transgressions in print matching
Seriously, to a longtime and reasonably conscientious seamstress, this is highly embarrassing. That looks like all kinds of heck, and I will be the first to admit it. Poor choice of fabric for this particular kind of design.

Oh well, you live and learn.

The front of the dress is pretty decent, though:
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Plus, the shape is perfect for my shape, and that’s the main object here. I have another piece of fabric earmarked for this same pattern, and I think it will play a whole lot nicer with this particular design.

In all future iterations of this pattern, the French darts will be with it from the start. I have traced them on to the back section of the pattern, and henceforth that’s how it will be made.

The pattern instructions suggested to omit the back zipper if possible, and I found it very, very possible to omit it. With the very floppy, very stretchy Jersey knit that I used, a zipper would have been superfluous to say the least.

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There was no provision for a neckline facing. The instructions suggested simply folding the neckline inward and stitching, but I prefer to face it with seam lace. I think this is a neater, stronger, and more attractive finish. Plus, I had a bit of lace that was such an ideal match to the color of the print!

As some of you who look at my Flickr sidebar may have seen, I used a bit of the scrap from this dress to make an asymmetrical tank top. I actually put the tank top together before I put the dress together because I am contrary like that. I’ve already used this top several times since assembly.

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And so here’s a hypothetical outfit featuring said tank top, a bolero made out of scrap fabric from a trouser project, and a lace skirt I bought at a local thrift shop. This outfit is practically free, since it is composed of leftovers and rejects.
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Yay for lo-budget fashion!

If you haven’t seen the “murmuration of starlings” video on the Internet yet, first things first, go and do it. It is beautiful and impressive and a testament to the wonders and glories of nature. It is also…how to put it…gratifyingly devoid of flying guano.

Now, then.

This morning, on my way to work, I had the great good fortune to witness a smaller, yet surprisingly similar Starling ‘Splosion out of the West Bottoms as I was crossing the bridge ‘round back of Kemper Arena. The teeming mess of starlings which populates the West Bottoms, colonising every power line, lining every roofline gutter, and pooping up an absolute storm beneath the Intercity Viaduct had taken to the air in a delightful ballet of tiny birds swooping around en masse.

My first thought upon witnessing the mass flight of little pest birds was, “hey, wow…this is just like that video on the Internet.” Except instead of being two wide-eyed English film students in a boat with a video camera, I was just a lone cranky Yankee office worker on a bicycle with no means of recording the phenomenon, other than writing about it in my blog some hours later.

My second thought (unfortunately) was, “Woah, the rain is picking up. Oh shit – that’s not just rain. Eeeeww.”

Rain, even in Kansas City, is rarely brown-and-white and fibrous.

Fortunately, providentially, and uncharacteristically, I was wearing a raincoat today, so I didn’t end up wearing bird poop directly on my person. All the same: Eeeeeww.”

I wonder if the girls in the boat discovered an unexpected and unwelcome spattering of starling poo when they got to where they were going. Probably they did.


(the bathroom is still a work in progress, so please don’t judge the crummy floor, the cheezy plastic tile on the wall, or my hair-and-makeup box on a cinder block)

I had no idea Jacuzzi was a brand. I thought it was like the technical term for a deep, fizzy bathtub. Apparently, they make everything you might install in a bathroom – including toilets.

Well, I guess you learn something every day.

I was remembering earlier today, an incident, a sad, pitiful, seriously pathetic incident Joel and I witnessed a couple of months ago.

We were outside a convenience store drinking some Gatorade on a hot ride and taking a break in the shade. A young fellow drives up in the absolutely shittiest old (late 1980s) Camaro I have ever in my life seen. It was hit on every corner and side, and the whole thing seemed to be decomposing. It was BARELY limping along.


(like this, only 100x shittier)

A rod was knocking. Hell, probably all of them were. It would barely idle. The steering belt was squealing. This car was the rolling definition of fucked up.

So, this poor schmuck cruises his busted car up to the air compressor, drops in his quarters, and airs up the tires. Then he drives it over to the gas pumps, LEAVES IT RUNNING (!!!!!) and gasses it up.

THEN, he sees fit to rev it up a couple of times.

Two good snorts and a BAM. Shit goes flying all out from under the car. Fucker shot a rod and puked out a mess of oil and shattered car guts all over the parking lot.

Poor sap had just probably sunk a good $20-30 bucks in fuel and tire pressure in that old shitheap, and blew the old wreck to bits.

I felt kind of bad for the guy, because there had to be some reason he was actually fuelling up such a shitty wreck of a car, but on the other hand, I thought, “you are one dumbassed motherfucker. You KNEW that car was trashed, you had to hear that rod talkin’, and you saw fit to redline it? You are seriously deficient in the brainmeats.”

In Michelle-World, all smartphones are Blackberries.

For example, all of the Project Managers in my office carry iPhones. However, when people call in and ask for a manager who is out in the field, I invariably tell the caller that “So & So is out in the field today, but he does have his Blackberry, so you should be able to reach him by e-mail.” Even though absolutely nobody I work with has a Blackberry, not even for their personal phone.

D’oh!

My other one is that any movie that you bring home to play on the television is a “video,” even though I haven’t rented a videocasette in over 10 years. For some reason, it never occurs to me to say “DVD.”

I don’t, however, call the DVD player a “VCR.”

Never let it be said that I am a wasteful woman. From 1.5 yards of 60″ wide woolen jersey, I wrought:

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One 3/4 sleeved pullover top.

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One lace-trimmed tank-top/camisole.

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A sports-bra.

All for under $40.

Yep, I pretty much bombed NaNoBloppo. After the big fancy post about sewing woolen knits, I pretty much hit the Writers Block Wall.

I had nothin’ I got nothin’.

I’ll maybe have something in a few days, but at the moment…

Yep. Not so much.

I’m also not done with the sports bra. I didn’t have enough elastic, so I have to acquire some. When I get that done, I will do the DIY Ibex follow-up post.

I beat Ibex!

Man, there are times that being a seamstress kicks ass. Not so much when you put a sleeve in a jacket upside down or get finagled into doing a shit-ton of alterations for no money, but when you get about $200 worth of performance gear for about $40, it fucking rules.

So, there’s this fancy-schmancy wool-based sports clothes company called Ibex. Their stuff is pretty sweet, I must say – I have two of their long sleeved base layer tops & two short-sleeved ones which form constituent parts of my traditional foul weather wooly carapace.

These Ibex shirts I bought just before Joel and I went on our coast-to-coast trip. Joel had a couple of Ibex tops sometime before that. But when we bought our Ibex garments, Joel was working at a large bike shop where he could get an employee purchase discount, which brought these high-end goods into our range.

Three years on, he has moved to a smaller shop closer to home, and while the job is great, the discounts are no longer a perquisite he can rely upon.

And three years on, our old Ibex gear is starting to get awfully tatty. I darn, and he darns and so our stuff is well mended, but tatty, none the less.

So, one day it struck my dim bulb that I sew, that I have no aversion to knits, and that I could probably replicate Ibex goods at home, using commercially available sewing patterns and fabrics. First, I tracked down wool jersey knits courtesy of Denver Fabrics. Then, on to patterns. For Joel, Simplicity 9499 provided the raglan-sleeved top. For myself, it was Vogue 8760. Denver Fabrics supplied the jersey-knit woolens in prices ranging from $7.50 to $10/yd. For a shirt for either of us, it required 1 yard for myself (
I would come to find out) and 1.5 for Mr. Long-Limbs. The patterns, after sale and coupons, came to just over $5/ea. Therefore, adding in notions, one could reasonably replicate an Ibex base-layer top for around $15-$17/ea.

I have my first top finished, and am working on his second, along with some bonus gear from scrap fabric. I found that I was able to eke an extra camisole and a sports bra out of 1.5 yds of this terracotta woolen jersey.

I shall post photos of the lot of it when I am done. The 3/4 sleeve raglan top, the camisole, and yes, the sports bra.

The camisole was cut from the tank-top pattern which came with my favored New Look 6564 jacket pattern. Both the jacket and the camisole have been home-run hits. I cut the camisole last week out of scrap from a dress which is another project soon to be in progress, just for fittings sake, and was 100% pleased with the fit and proportion.

The sports bra is Green Pepper 407, which is not in the least glammy, but it was at the $5 price point and seems like it would be a difficult thing to fuck up. We shall see how it goes.

Green Pepper patterns seem to be pretty good, at least judging from the results I had making Joel a pair of #524, the Sunset Bay Cargo zip-offs. They’re to replace an ancient pair of zip-offs he bought at MajrThrift a squillion years ago. While I don’t love the inner leg gusset of this pattern (it seems to be an unnecessary complication), the rest of it went together beautifully. This is literally the best fly-front I have ever put together.

Photos will follow, probably Wednesday, after I’ve washed laundry, and therefore re-claimed my top, and finished up the camisole and the bra.

Anyway, the tally of my theoretical savings is as follows:

TOP Ibex:  $75 Pattern on sale $5 Fabric:  $15 (1.5 yds recommended)
CAMISOLE Ibex:  $55 Pattern coupon $7 Fabric: $0 – scrap from top
SPORTS BRA Ibex:  $55 Pattern reg. price $5 Fabric: $0 – scrap from top
TOTAL Ibex: $185 Patterns: $17 Fabric: $15
Sewing Total:  $37 for fabric, patterns, & notions

Very rarely does the balance of home sewing swing so heavily in my favor. I’m almost sort of impressed, actually.

Order has been restored

IMG_0406 by Meetzorp
IMG_0406, a photo by Meetzorp on Flickr.

Okay, I have gone and fixed it.

It's hard to be chic with an armpit on your shoulder

I guess this is what you’d call a wardrobe malfunction.

I finished stitching down the facings on this bolero and went to go model it for Joel.

This is what happened:
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Sadly, this is not the first time I’ve pulled a stunt like this. Unfortunately, it is the furthest I’ve gotten in the completion of a garment assembled in such a wrongheaded fashion.

To the seam ripper, anon!

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